Life is Hard – When the Downs Hit

life is hard, what to do when the downs hit

At some point in your life, you’ve probably been told: “life is hard”.

Well, it is. Everyone is told that. But what exactly does it mean in retrospect?

Whether it’s emotional hardships, financial struggles, or even just problems with others, problems in life are bound to happen to everyone. However, nobody really talks about what to do when the hardships come and how to deal with them the correct way.

Unfortunately, some might say that you should just ‘toughen up’ and take it, but that also is not the best way.

In this post, I’ll be emphasizing the proper way to deal with life’s hardships.

This post will get personal with some of my own experience, so hopefully, that expresses my point in the best possible way.

You might also enjoy: Failure or Success? — Why Failure is an Option

what to do when life is hard

When Life Becomes Difficult

Despite how it may make you feel, going through a tough time in your life is completely normal and part of living. You might feel lonely and like you just can’t take anymore.

Trust me, I’ve been there. It sucks.

Unfortunately, the time of your life might just switch up oddly quickly to something a lot harder to deal with. Anything can fall under the category of a hard time, from being stressed about school to even bigger issues such as relationship problems.

Especially during these hard times in your life, it might be difficult to come up with what you should do. With all these hardships clogging your mind, it would be understandable if you start to get confused.

Don’t Victimize Yourself

However, the one thing you shouldn’t do is panic and victimize yourself.

Despite how hard your life is, you shouldn’t victimize yourself.

Victimizing yourself causes you so much more unnecessary pain in the long run. Sure it might feel satisfying to do in the heat of the moment, but it doesn’t actually solve your problem.

Rather than wondering why whatever is happening in your life is happening, you should think about what you can do in your power to solve it.

Of course, this is easier said than done.

I’ve victimized myself many times in the past and still get tempted to do so to this day. Whenever I did victimize myself, I only felt pain and emptiness because that problem wasn’t necessarily solved.

victim mindset when life gets hard
Don’t give in to that victimization mentality, or you’ll be running circles.

You Want Your Actions to Have Positive Value

What I’m trying to say is that your actions should have value, especially when your life is hard. You don’t want to waste emotional energy and thoughts on something that will just waste your time and harm you.

If you’ve found yourself doing any of these things that I’m saying not to do, don’t worry. I’ve done them in the past too.

In fact, it is likely that almost everyone has at one point.

Map Out Your Problems and a Course of Action

One thing that has worked surprisingly well for me is to write down my issues or type them out.

Of course, this is weird, considering I have countless documents or notebooks that have some of my problems from various different times. However, all that counts is that it works wonders.

To be honest, sometimes I use this website as a way to write about my problems indirectly. If I do research and post about problems that I am experiencing, I not only help myself but help others too!

By writing out your issues, you visualize them to yourself. That helps you see that you do not in fact have as many issues as you may have thought.

Considering this prevents overthinking, it kills multiple birds with one stone.

I still am working on my issues with overthinking, and this is one of my favorite ways to combat it.

Write Out Potential Solutions Too

If you’ve already written out your problems, why not write out potential ways to solve them too?

Sure you’ve visualized your issues, but visualizing potential solutions to those issues will force you to take definitive action instead of consistently clouding your mind with worries and despair. On top of that, it keeps you from staying in the same place your whole life.

With that being said, try and identify multiple solutions to your issues and analyze which one is the most desirable to you.

From there, it makes taking action a whole lot easier.

You might also enjoy: How to Find Your Purpose of Life: A Simple Guide

And Then Things Got Rough for Me

Real quick, I want to make something clear.

Even though I host a podcast about how to better yourself and write all these posts about ways to work on yourself, I also have problems just like everyone else.

I’m kind of a human too.

Things have especially gotten difficult for me over these last few months.

Senior Year Issues

Considering this year is my senior year of high school, there is obviously a lot of pressure on me to achieve good grades and get accepted to a decent college.

The main challenge was not that, but having to balance this with my podcast, website, and personal issues that began to arise.

‘What are these personal issues?’ you might ask.

Well, I won’t go into too much detail to keep things private but it mainly consisted of three things:

  • Toxicity from people I thought were close to me
  • Slacking on my website and podcast
  • Issues with my relationships with others

It took me weeks to collect myself and honestly one of the best things I did was consistently still go to the gym, which served as an outlet.

What did I do to solve these issues?

Well, I wrote them out, just like I did above.

The Outcome of Solving my Issues the Way I did

Writing my potential solutions afterward was also extremely helpful, and through that, I took definitive actions instead of allowing them to consume my whole year.

Sure, I may have overthought and felt pure sadness for myself, but that did not last.

This was primarily because I did not let it last.

I addressed the problem at hand, made some mistakes along the way, learned from them, and essentially solved my issues definitively.

Because this is how life works, there are definitely going to be more problems in my life later on, and knowing how to solve these ones serves as guidance for the ones coming.

What Not to Do When Life is Hard

I’ve gone over what are the best things to do when your life gets hard and even shared my own experience.

But what about the biggest thing you SHOULD NOT do?

It can definitely be hard to not do this and if you catch yourself doing it, stop and correct yourself. It happens.

There are so many different things that you should not do, but they all connect to one thing: choosing to just give up.

Don’t Just Give Up

By saying don’t give up, I am being general [on purpose].

I am including everything from overthinking to victimizing yourself.

Whenever you have a problem and choose to do something that serves no benefit to you except immediate pleasure, part of you subconciously gives up solving it.

When I say this, I mean that by doing something like drinking your problems away, or using relationships to get away from your issues, a part of you literally gives up solving the problem at that moment.

Don’t Kill Time, Redirect it

Rather than wasting this precious time doing something that doesn’t solve your issue, put that time towards the painful process of confronting and solving it.

Problems range in their severity, and it can be hard to not give up when faced with a tough problem. However, don’t give up.

Don’t do it.

If you give up, then what? You’ll just keep suffering from your problem.

You’re the only one that will suffer substantially.

So remember that, and don’t give up. Use your problems to make you stronger, or at least get through them.

I appreciate the read! Let me know in the comments how you solve your issues and what has worked for you.

**Thaaer Alrajab**Instagram**Spotify**Facebook

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